Title: Stolen Pleasures

Author: D.M. Evans

Rating: NC-17

Spoilers: Takes place after “Orpheus.”

Summary: Faith faces up to her needs and wants as she comes down from her Orpheus trip and readies herself for battling the First and what she wants takes her by surprise.

Author’s Note: This was written for the fourth lyric wheel challenge. Thanks to Jason for the lyrics by Liz Phair, ‘Why Can’t I?” (lyrics at the end)

Author’s Note 2: Some of the dialogue was taken from “Orpheus” itself

Author's Note 3: Contains mild Bondage and Domination

A good long nap down and I still felt like I was coming off a really bad trip. I probably was; following Angel through his twisted, sick past definitely qualified as a bad trip but it was worth it. I knew now that change truly was possible. I wasn’t doomed. Angel had changed and so could I and in a few hours I was going to Sunnydale filled with hope for the first time in…well, ever.

Willow had wanted to leave right away but I had been wasted. She realized an exhausted, drugged Slayer was useless so let me collapse for a while. Now Willow was in a confab with Wes and Fred, trying to pick their brains about ways to confront the First. Angel was somewhere, brooding, but that was to be expected. Who the hell knew what Angelus had done in his short time running wild? It would probably be a while before Angel felt comfortable with his friends again. I knew how that was.

I wondered where the others were. The hotel seemed quiet. Where were Gunn and Lorne? Truthfully, I couldn’t care less about what Cordelia was up to. She was happy to be a bitch to me. I guessed I deserved it but Wes told me what Cordy had done to betray Angel with Connor. She had no room to judge me. Of course, there were strange thoughts running through my head. I figured, when I crashed in bed a few hours ago, my dreams would be filled with Angel. After all, we had shared something weird and intimate. I knew him inside out, better than anyone, even Buffy. It’d be natural if Angel were in my dreams. Only he wasn’t.

Instead that scrawny kid with the chip on his shoulder played the lead role. I would be the first to admit slaying makes me hungry and horny. I had almost enjoyed kicking Connor’s ass twice. I felt that sweet, lowdown tickle all the time I was doing it. I almost wished I could have fought Angelus again in that drugged dream state because the sexual excitement had been missing the first few times around, too battered by the Beast to enjoy fighting the vampire.

It only stood to reason I was horny as hell. A few years in jail does that to a girl. Oh, there had been some slimy guards who’d offered to do me whether I wanted it or not but most of them had been too scared of me to carry out the threat. They might not have known what a Slayer was, but there was something about me that stayed their hands. That sexual thrill came back to me mid-air as me and Wes plunged out the window.

On the drive home, I almost thought it would be Wes who’d break the dry spell. Gone was the Sunnydale fuck-up, replaced by something more dangerous and a thousand times more alluring. He’d gone to the mat for me, despite what I’d done to him but once we got to the hotel, I could see it wasn’t me he wanted. His eyes never left Stick-Girl. Gunn had eyes only for Fred, too. I didn’t want my fingerprints on that crime scene. All I wanted was a good romp, a few moments of stolen pleasures, and my best two prospects were already tied up in something ugly, figures. I went to the bathroom thinking about it. Was that all I really wanted, a little guiltless sex? Yeah, actually it was. I had nearly died today. Chances were I was going to die in Sunnydale. I accepted that but that didn’t mean I didn’t want to take it down off the shelf one last time. If Gunn and Wes were out of the picture then all that was left were Lorne, Angel and Connor. It wasn’t hard to whittle down the pile. Green wasn’t my thing and Angel was totally off limits. Yeah, I had wanted him in Sunnydale but just to prove I could have him, to screw over Buffy, and hey, he was gorgeous. Even if I hadn’t taken that long, strange trip inside his mind, Angel would still be off limits. He was the best friend I’ve ever had. I’d die before letting sex screw that up.

Maybe that’s why the kid was in my dreams; my subconscious knew he was the only choice. Besides, there was something kinky hot about a guy who could match my strength. Buffy and I had talked about that once, being able to hurt a guy without even trying. She held back more in the sack than me, proven when I banged Riley harder than she had ever thought to. Here was a chance for me to just let go. Connor might look breakable but I knew better. Connor wanted me. I’d have to be blind to miss his puppy-dog eyes. I knew the others had caught it, too, but didn’t say anything. Well, Gunn and Wes probably remembered being teen-aged walking hard-on’s. I doubted Connor was any different than any teenaged boy, deep down. Wes knew me too well. I was sure if he paid the least bit attention to Connor, Wes was thinking ‘it’s inevitable, we’re gonna get down to it.’ The question was, did Connor still feel something for Cordelia? I didn’t care but he might. Lorne told me Connor had sat with me when I was dying. That said something, didn’t it? I might have kicked his ass and humiliated him in front of Wes and Gunn the night we found the Beast, hell that felt like a lifetime ago, but the kid stayed with me so I wouldn’t die alone. I found that sweet, then shuddered at that way too Little-Miss-Innocent-Buffy-like thought. Okay, Faith, this is a really bad idea. What’s Angel gonna think if you bang his kid? That thought held me in place, staring in the bathroom mirror, but it did nothing for the growing damp between my thighs. I want to ride someone until he dropped, and whether he knew it or not, Connor was the best alternative. I glanced over at the shower; it’s old, pathetic, lacking a detachable showerhead. Besides, I don’t want a little shower fun. If my days on this world are numbered, I wanted the real thing. I wanted to feel the heat of my lover’s body, to taste his salt, to see the storm raging in his eyes.

I thought Angel would understand that. He might even be happy to have Connor concentrating on someone other than Cordelia. I had had a full hit of Angel’s rage against her when I was inside his head. I had sifted through the most current times of his life first, absorbing everything before I even knew I was heading for a shirttail ride through Angel-Land. He was furious with Cordelia, because she was supposed to be in love with him and a surrogate mom to Connor. Figures Cordy would go the soap opera route and be the step-mom who diddles her cute stepson.

Angel wanted what was best for his kid, even as Connor had tried to kill him. I had seen it in Angel’s eyes as together we subdued Connor in the basement before he could drive that stake home. Angel hadn’t been afraid for himself. He just wanted his son to be all right. I hadn’t believed Angel had asked Connor to kill him, until that Orpheus trip but I knew Angel also regretted it. It was too much for those slender shoulders to bear, at least in Angel’s eyes. I wasn’t too sure Connor wouldn’t have enjoyed killing his father, or maybe not. I got the impression he held back fighting me. Maybe he wasn’t as ready to kill as his smart mouth would lead me to believe.

I headed downstairs. No signs of Angel. Good, if I saw him, I’d be back upstairs loving on my fingers because I’d feel too guilty. Come on, girl. What Angel doesn’t know, won’t kill him. I wished I knew where to look for the kid. I didn’t know his haunts and it sucked having to ask directions. I was ready to start a bottom to top search of the hotel when Gunn and Lorne entered the lobby. Gunn looked pissed.

“What’s up?” I asked. “We’re heading out for Chinese,” Lorne replied, breezily.

“The think tank is hungry,” Gunn growled, nodding toward Wes’ office. “Want something?” God, real food, not prison food, what a novel idea. When I was done with the kid, I’d be all the more the hungrier. “How’re we sitting for money?” “Sky’s the limit, hon,” Lorne said.

“Hot and sour soup, fried wontons and honey chicken,” I replied. “Do you know where Connor is?” “Gonna kick his ass again?” Gunn grinned.

“Something like that. He wanted to show me what he could do. This is his last chance,” I replied.

“Last seen, giving his father a run for his money in sulking.” Lorne pointed at the basement door as he and Gunn headed out.

“Thanks.” I opened the door to the basement and saw Connor sitting on the floor, leaning against Angelus’ cage. I locked the door behind me and came down the stairs. He looked up at me with those blue eyes of his. They really were stunning, his best feature. He hadn’t inherited much from Angel in the looks department but I didn’t mind. He was cute in a gawky sort of way. He had a stake in his hands, probably wishing he had used it on Angel. He pressed it so hard on his fingertip, blood was welling up but he didn’t seem to notice. His eyes were on me. Hell, we haven’t fucked yet but heads spinning and all that junk. I was pretty sure he wanted me.

It really had been too long since I’d gotten it on. I was so swollen and aroused the cotton of my underwear felt like a caress as I walked down the steps. Connor swallowed hard. Was he hoping for something or did he expect me to beat on him some more? Could he smell my arousal? He was our bloodhound, so I was betting he could. “What are you doing down here?” I asked.

“Thinking.” “You always do that stroking your stake?”

His eyes narrowed then he glanced down at the piece of wood. He tossed it aside angrily. I went over to him and took his hand. I pressed my lips to his bleeding digit. Connor just stared at me curiously. I sucked that finger into my mouth. To me, it just tasted like salt and copper. I wondered what blood tasted like to vampires.

“Why are you doing that?” I let him go. “Haven’t you ever heard of kissing it and making it better?” He shook his head. “I’m glad you’re okay now.”

“Thanks for sitting with me when…you know.” It suddenly hit hard that I had nearly died again and this time, unlike when Buffy had gutted me, I actually cared. I shuddered. Connor put a hand on me. “Is something wrong, Faith?”

“No. So, you wanted to show me what you can do.” I smiled at him.

He looked around, as if judging how much room we had to get busy in. “You want to fight again?” I took his hand, running it over my hip. “I think you know what I mean.”

“I like the feel of leather,” he muttered and I couldn’t imagine him wearing it but whatever. I backed him into the cage. “I bet you do.”

I attacked him fiercely with my mouth. Stunned, he didn’t respond then pushed me away. His blue eyes were enormous. “Do you want me?” I stepped back, letting him decide for himself what he wanted. Did he get my meaning? “Too much, but they’ll be mad.” His eyes canted toward the ceiling. He seemed very torn. Maybe I should just quit while I was ahead. “I’m supposed to be responsible now.” “They’ll never know. I leave here in a few hours. This is just for tonight, stolen pleasures,” I assured him, smoothing my hands down my sides. He watched my breasts jiggle as I did so. “Now what do you really want to say?” “Why can’t I breathe whenever I think about you?” he asked naively, and I just grinned. He was on me instantly. Either Cordelia was a good teacher or the kid was a natural talent because the way he sucked my tongue into his mouth, making me feel that kiss deep down, was more than I was anticipating. I was expecting adolescent fumblings, not great for my last time before I headed out to die, but what was a girl to do? Instead, I was being treated to someone not afraid to explore with his tongue.

I shoved him back against the bars. He grunted, not expecting me to be this rough. I grabbed his hands, holding them to the metal. He moaned and took hold of the bars. “Stay like that,” I told him and he nodded eagerly. Surprise, surprise, not only was Angel’s kid submissive, he was kinky. Most boys would have bolted at the sight of a cage or protested at being given directions but not Connor. I shoved his shirt up, tearing it off over his head. He let go of the bars only long enough to let me get his shirt off then gripped them again.

Some men could get off just by having their nipples sucked. I hoped Connor had a little more restraint than that as I captured one of those pink pearls of flesh between my lips. He sighed and dropped a hand to caress my head. “Bad boy.” I took that hand and rapped it against the bars. He took hold of the metal again. I went back to teasing his nipples then lathed his ribs with my tongue. There wasn’t much of him to hide those bones. He needed a meal or ten. I could see his erection straining against his baggy pants. Whose clothes did he have on? He looked like a little kid playing dress up in daddy’s clothes. I slipped his belt out of the loops and grabbed both his hands, pulling them high over his head. I started looping the leather around his wrist to secure him to the bars. “Hey! Wait!” I heard the panic in his voice, saw it in his eyes. “Trust me.” When he nodded, I finished securing him to the cage. I looked at him stretched out against the bars. He looked innocent and devilish at the same time. I generally liked men to pleasure me but I wanted to a little something for him. I guessed jail had made me generous.

I undid his zipper, kneeling in front of him and took down his pants, moment of truth time. There was nothing more disappointing than to find you’ve hooked up with a one-inch wonder. Luckily, I wasn’t disappointed in the least but I was surprised. He had a foreskin. I hadn’t expected that but given what I knew about his history, I should have guessed. I had been with an uncut guy before and it’s odd, the skin all loose and jiggly. I was always afraid I was gonna hurt them.

“What are you doing?” I wished he’d stop with the wide-eyed look because it made him seem too young to be having sex. Of course, I couldn’t tell that by the hard cock jutting at me, quivering. “Never had a blow job?” I asked and the look of puzzlement on his face was the answer. He shook his head.

I smiled and kissed the slick tip of his penis. I didn’t realize his eyes could get bigger but I wished he wouldn’t watch me doing this. It made me self-conscious and I hated that. Oh well, she who hesitates is lost. I swallowed him in one well-practiced move. It felt wonderful to finally have hot, ready flesh at my disposal and I devoured him like I was coming off a hunger strike. I opened my throat, taking him to the root.

He groaned and I heard his head fall back, clanking off the bars. I spared a glance up as I nipped over his testicles with lip-blunted teeth and his eyes were shut, a thoroughly pleased _expression on his face. Hey, he was capable of looking something other than pissed off, fancy that.

I curled my tongue around his cock, slowly taking him back in. Leather strained against metal as he exploded. Call me crazy, but I missed the salty taste of a man. I drank him up eagerly then sat back on my haunches, looking up at him. He dangled from the restraints, panting hard, his body shaking.. Licking my lips, I pulled off his shoes and took off the rest of his clothing. I got up and studied him, my own fire still slowly growing. How does one look innocent and wicked at the same time? He still seemed a little stunned at what I had just done. Figures Queen C hadn’t ‘lowered’ herself to teach him about oral pleasures, at least not the kind she had to give. I peeled out of my clothing and Connor’s eyes fluttered opened. He watched with keen interest as I shimmied out of my leather pants. His fingers were working the belt loose. He was pretty good at that, his fingers long, limber, holding promise. “Do you want to find out what happens to bad boys who free themselves?” I asked, huskily.

The evil grin said he most certainly did. Good thing he was submissive or Angel could have Angelus Junior on his hands. I kissed the hollow of Connor’s throat, wondering if he’d let me kiss him on the lips. Some men freaked if you didn’t brush after you’ve blown them. Ungrateful bastards. I pressed my lips to his and he met me voraciously, good boy.

I grabbed his soft hair, pulling him into the kiss even more. Connor’s hands took a better hold of the bars and he brought his feet off the ground, capturing me with his legs. He locked his ankles behind me, pressing me against him. My nipples tightened as they brushed his chest. I felt his now soft member caught between us and suspected it wouldn’t be long before it sprang back up, ready for action.

Usually when I get bouncy with a guy, I got gone afterwards. This would be no different but there were men I mentally book marked for looking up down the road. Connor made the list. He couldn’t have much experience but he made up for it with natural talent. I loosened the belt around his wrists and he put his feet down. I took him to the ground in a swift, hard movement but he didn’t seem to mind the rough treatment.

I held onto his wrists, putting his hands over his head. I nipped his chin then asked, “You know how to go down?” I wasn’t expecting him to say yes and wrinkle of his brow told me all I needed to know. “Let’s see how good you are puzzling things out.”

Maybe I should explain things to him but some guys get really pissy about that, like it’s an insult. I wasn’t too used to virgins, or near ones, too much work. Xander sprang to mind. Ugh, don’t think about it, girl. Okay, Xander wasn’t bad but I didn’t want to have to face him after all I had done and I had to soon enough. I let his hands go and knelt over him. His long, strong fingers gripped my hips and he tentatively touched the tip of his tongue to my moist flesh. I think he liked what he tasted because he quickly grew bolder, licking and sucking, probing deep into me. I felt a little shiver starting in my toes, racing up like wild fire. I moaned loudly, grabbing his wrists to steady myself so I didn’t bear down and break his nose as it rubbed over my clit. When the wave crested, I slipped out of his grip, getting to my feet. He got to his before I could tell him to stay where he was. His lips and chin glistened with my juices. I shoved him back against the bars, my hand going to his cock, hard and arching upwards again. I hadn’t thought to filch some condoms from Wes or Gunn. I had the proof in my hands that Angel didn’t believe in them. Oh well, I did what every girl did when she got caught in a storm without her umbrella, told myself it was only one time and what’s the worst that could happen? I pressed the tip of his cock against my swollen mons and he rubbed against me. Bracing myself on his shoulders, I squeezed his hips with my thighs, my feet off the ground.

Connor slipped into me like some lost piece of the puzzle finally found. I missed this to no end. Fingers just weren’t the same. He pumped into me a little awkwardly because of the position we were in. He couldn’t get in deep but I didn’t want him to go fast. His short, slow strokes excited me. His hands slid behind the small of my back, supporting me. I let go of his shoulders, letting him suspend me, surprised the skinny little thing could hold me effortlessly. I shifted my position, putting my leg up against his chest. Most guys probably would have dropped me on my head but Connor just went with me, holding secure as he thrust into me. In this position, it was like having sex in space. He let my head dangle lower and another orgasm tore through me.

Riding it out, I shifted again, getting my feet on the ground. I pulled him back down to the floor and instead of taking my preferred position on top, I let him dominate. I wanted to feel his full strength but he was too afraid to let me have it. Connor knew he could hurt someone. Had he hurt Cordy? “Give in to it, Connor,” I whispered. “You’re not gonna hurt me. Slayer, remember?” His answer was more a hungry growl and he did just what he was told. The power in those bunching wiry muscles was amazing. No one had ever pounded me like this. I might actually be sore later in that glorious way I hadn’t known in a long time. I damn near dug his shoulder blades out as another orgasm ignited in me then another. Connor flooded into me, making that “I’ve punctured a lung, I’m dying,” panting noise. Men could really sound like they were about to give up the ghost during sex.

We both lay in a quivering puddle of flesh for a while, sweaty, salty and damn if I wasn’t hungry. Finally I rolled out from under him, fluids trickling down my leg. I grabbed my underpants. What were the chances I could get upstairs before my leather pants got icky? He took his cues from me and started dressing. “You’re leaving,” he said quietly, not looking at me.

“You know I am,” I replied, thinking of smuggling him to Sunnydale. Hey, the boy could be an asset in a fight, right?

“You won’t be back.” He sounded glum.

“Keep a good thought for me surviving the week,” I said with a weak smile. “That was…” “Wild,” I said and he grinned, nodding.

“Thanks.” I hated this ‘what do you say after sex’ stuff. “We’d better get a quick shower. Dinner’s probably already here.”

With that, I bolted up the stairs, without looking at him. If I looked, I might feel like staying and I couldn’t. I wasn’t the kind of girl who stayed around and had relationships. Staying would mean fighting Cordelia for him, explaining to Angel what I had done and risk losing his friendship. No, it had to stay stolen pleasures. Connor didn’t protest. We went to our rooms, showered and met back for dinner like nothing had happened. No one seemed to guess that Angelus’ cage had been turned into a sexual arena. Fred, Wes and Willow barely paused in their arcane ponderings long enough to eat. Gunn looked bored and Lorne was drinking again. No signs of Angel or Cordelia as we wolfed down dinner. There wasn’t a morsel of honey chicken left after I was done. Connor ate with an appetite I wouldn’t have believed given the slenderness of him.

It was nearly time to leave and I had to say goodbye to Angel. I got up to go look for him but not without pausing long enough to ruffle Connor’s hair. He smiled at me but didn’t try to stop me. I found Angel outside the garden. I went out and he glanced back at me. I could swear Angel knew instantly what I had done. There was a strange look in his eyes then it faded and a hint of a smile touched his lips. Thank God, because I couldn’t take it if Angel was angry.

“Hey.” “How’re you feeling?” “Like I did mushrooms and got eaten by a bear,” I replied and that was the truth but I also felt good, too, loved one last time maybe, depending on what cards fate dealt me in the Dale.

“That about sums it up,” he replied and now that I looked close, he did seem rough. And we talked carefully, like we were afraid to say anything too meaningful, too intimate after that brain tour because I think we were both afraid we’d break down and cry. I made a half assed joke about hugging and I knew we both wanted to do that, just hold on and not let go like it would keep the bad things at bay. I had saved him from himself and he had done the same for me. What I had done with his kid didn’t figure into this tender moment. God, why couldn’t I have had this love and acceptance earlier in my life when it would have made a difference?

Just as we were about to go inside so I could collect Willow and get gone, I distinctly heard Cordelia saying, “I’m going to kill you for what you did to Connor.” I looked around but she wasn’t in the garden. Since Angel didn’t react, I must have imagined those words with all their venom. By mere chance, I glanced up and saw her face in an upstairs window. The hate that showered down on me was chilling but how could she know? It was just me trying to psyche myself out. If everyone were mad at me, I’d have no reason to come back and face all the weird feelings I was having.

I shook it off and followed Angel inside. Stolen pleasures were a fleeting thing. It was time to go and meet my destiny and if Death was going to come for me in Sunnydale, he’d better be prepared because I wasn’t going to go quietly. No, I’d rip his nipples off before he took me. That thought cheered me and I went to say my goodbyes. If I were lucky, they’d just be farewells til next time. I wanted to come back here and I had never felt like that before. Maybe, at long last, I had found a home. Now wouldn’t that be nice?